A girl's guide to faking it

Thanks to Irish descent, I have skin so pale I could be a convincing stand-in as Casper.

I embrace it (most of the time) and can rest smugly in the knowledge that in my forties I will not resemble a leather boot. But when summer (and skin-baring clothing) is upon us, it's time to ring in the emergency assistance of the 'faux glow'.

Since the 80s, fake tan has come a long way. No longer do we need to risk looking like a walking bottle of Tang. Streak-proof, non-orange products are everywhere.

However, the industry still needs to catch up on stink-factor. Let's face it, most fake tans emit an unpleasantly sour waft once applied. A waft so strong even girls like me with big brothers (and thus acclimatised to regular strenches) will recoil in horror.

I've road-tested most big brands for streaks n stinks, and can heartily recommend these 3:

ST TROPEZ AUTOBRONZANT (about $45AUD for a pump-action bottle)

Weird name for a fake tan (is 'autobronzant' a word or a line from The Terminator?). But this stuff really works. Yes it's pricey, but it is foolproof, gives instant colour, smells decent and has a green base which means it develops into a natural-looking brown as opposed to an orange-based tinge.

PALMER'S NATURAL BRONZE GRADUAL TANNING MOISTURISER (SO CHEAP IT'S NOT WORTH LISTING THE PRICE)

The cash-conscious or tan-shy should snap this up immediately. For those who like to start out slowly and ease into things, this is your new best friend. It has a chocolatey aroma too, which can never be a bad thing. This budget buy outclasses the over-hyped Johnson's Holiday Skin, which quite frankly smells horrendous and is prone to making most skin look almost as yellow as the bottle it comes in.

ELLA BACHE GREAT TAN WITHOUT SUN ($39AUD)

Yes, this is a bit messy to apply. To guard against hand-staining you need to use a pair of bizarre sponge-gloves. Hide these from your love interest as he or she will think you've gone mad. But the results are worth it. It imparts a more glowing, natural and light-diffusing finish than any other FT I've ever tried. Instantly. And it has a lovely expensive-salon smell. Purchase immediately.

Top 3 application tips:

- Scrub your body first with a cheap mitt (about $4 from most chemists).
- Don't muck around. Do it fast and rub it in well.
- Wash your hands thoroughly and gently pat a towel on your knees, elbows and toes to prevent staining.

The objective of using fake tan is to give a subtle glow. There's nothing fresh and summery about trying to channel a 'girl from Ipanema' vibe when the only thing Brazilian is your bikini line.

If you're fair, stick with 1-2 shades darker than your normal skin-tone or risk eventually looking like this.


~ Rosie x